Parshat Ki Teitzei #2: Ben Sorer UMoreh

Attackers kill eight in Pakistan
September 3, 2003

A FATHER in northern Pakistan led seven of his friends and relatives in an attack on the home of his married daughter, killing her and seven other people in an apparent honor killing, police said today.

The suspect, identified as Khaliq Dad, attacked his daughter and her husband's family late Tuesday in Totalai village, about 250 kilometers (155 miles) north of Peshawar, the capital of Pakistan's North West Frontier Province, said Tajbar Khan, a local police officer.

The dead included four children. The victims were sleeping in a courtyard when the attackers sprayed them with bullets from assault rifles. Many poor villagers sleep outside to stay cool during Pakistan's intensely hot summers.

Khan said no arrests have been made.

Dad's slain daughter, identified as Zulfania, had allegedly married against her father's will.

Angered by the marriage, Dad reported his son-in-law to the police, charging him with kidnapping his daughter. The man, Omar Shah, was arrested and jailed in 2000, but a court acquitted him after Dad's daughter testified she married Shah willingly.

Shah was not at home at the time of Tuesday's attack.

Village elders had convened a jirga, or council, in an attempt to make peace between the two families. At the council meeting last year, Shah's father agreed to pay 40,000 rupees (US$700) to Dad and give two girls in marriage into Dad's family as a settlement, Khan said.

While the man made the payment, he was allegedly unwilling to marry his daughters into Dad's family. Dad felt insulted, Khan said, leading to the attack.

Parshat Ki Teitzei contains the law of the Ben Sorer UMoreh, the rebellious son, who is executed for his rebellion, something which is very hard to comprehend. The psukim, Devarim 21:18-21, states:

כִּי-יִהְיֶה לְאִישׁ, בֵּן סוֹרֵר וּמוֹרֶה--אֵינֶנּוּ שֹׁמֵעַ, בְּקוֹל אָבִיו וּבְקוֹל אִמּוֹ; וְיִסְּרוּ אֹתוֹ, וְלֹא יִשְׁמַע אֲלֵיהֶם.
וְתָפְשׂוּ בוֹ, אָבִיו וְאִמּוֹ; וְהוֹצִיאוּ אֹתוֹ אֶל-זִקְנֵי עִירוֹ, וְאֶל-שַׁעַר מְקֹמוֹ.
וְאָמְרוּ אֶל-זִקְנֵי עִירוֹ, בְּנֵנוּ זֶה סוֹרֵר וּמֹרֶה--אֵינֶנּוּ שֹׁמֵעַ, בְּקֹלֵנוּ; זוֹלֵל, וְסֹבֵא.
וּרְגָמֻהוּ כָּל-אַנְשֵׁי עִירוֹ בָאֲבָנִים, וָמֵת, וּבִעַרְתָּ הָרָע, מִקִּרְבֶּךָ; וְכָל-יִשְׂרָאֵל, יִשְׁמְעוּ וְיִרָאוּ.

"If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son, that will not hearken to the voice of his father, or the voice of his mother, and though they chasten him, will not hearken unto them;

then shall his father and his mother lay hold on him, and bring him out unto the elders of his city, and unto the gate of his place;

and they shall say unto the elders of his city: 'This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he doth not hearken to our voice; he is a glutton, and a drunkard.'

And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die; so shalt thou put away the evil from the midst of thee; and all Israel shall hear, and fear."

Let us not focus for now on why the rebellious son is chayav mita (Chazal give explanations) and instead take for granted that he is actually chayav mita for his conduct. An issue totally aside from all that is the role of the parents.

Before the Torah spoke, the social context is that there is a family structure and an extended family structure (bet av), and even more extended than that we have the tribe, shevet.

The big chiddush of ben sorer umoreh is that given a specific situation in which the child may be chayav mita, it is not the role of the direct parents to be the judge, jury, and executioners.

וְתָפְשׂוּ בוֹ, אָבִיו וְאִמּוֹ; וְהוֹצִיאוּ אֹתוֹ אֶל-זִקְנֵי עִירוֹ, וְאֶל-שַׁעַר מְקֹמוֹ.

They have to go to the ziknei haIr, to the gate where there is the court of judgement, and those strangers, who are appointed to mete out justice, try the case. His mother and father give testimony:

וְאָמְרוּ אֶל-זִקְנֵי עִירוֹ, בְּנֵנוּ זֶה סוֹרֵר וּמֹרֶה--אֵינֶנּוּ שֹׁמֵעַ, בְּקֹלֵנוּ; זוֹלֵל, וְסֹבֵא.

And then the people of the town, if he is indeed objectively guilty, mete out the punishment.

וּרְגָמֻהוּ כָּל-אַנְשֵׁי עִירוֹ בָאֲבָנִים, וָמֵת, וּבִעַרְתָּ הָרָע, מִקִּרְבֶּךָ; וְכָל-יִשְׂרָאֵל, יִשְׁמְעוּ וְיִרָאוּ.

This eliminates some of the subjectivity of personal insult/feelings and allows true justice to happen.

In the case cited above, the father felt personally insulted and took vengeance, outside the realm of the court. This type of "honor killing" seems to be what the Torah is trying to prevent.